Leave your religion at the door - quotes
Nine-year-old boy to friends: Don't be talking smack about Jesus. He was one of our greatest presidents!
Hip chick in black whose dog poops in street: No! No! Jesus fucking Christ! [Looks up and notices she's in front of large church.] Oops.
(My Favorite)
High school boy: He's like a fat homeless Jesus who stole a rich man's coat.
Soccer mom to another: You know, Friday nights are always a great time for Jesus.
Student on phone: All I have to say about being friends with Jesus is that unlimited fish sandwiches and wine doesn't sound like a bad deal.
Crazy guy: Praise Jesus! But stay outta my way -- I will stab you.
Girl to friend: I mean, come on -- who really cares about Jesus?
2 comments:
` 'Kay.... I like. BTW, as you may know, I am friends with Jesus. On commenting on how, when people pray to him and they don't seem to be answered, he says 'apparently I work in mysterious ways'.
` Also... I just think this is frickin' hilarious... this Jon Bon Beckford whateverthehell his name is. Beckjord... he's a nutcase or something. Well, I took some photos of my footprints and he's putting them on his website because he thinks they're bigfoot prints!
` AAAAA HAAAAA HAAAAAAA HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
` Just gotta tell everyone! I'm keeping my mad sci post up-to-date about this new development.
Overheard at a lecture by the Dalai Lama this week:
middle-aged woman 1: Have they picked the new one yet?
middle-aged woman 2: No, I don't think they do that 'til he dies.
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