29 Things

I'm almost a week into this new age of mine. I've been trying it on for size, seeing if it feels any different. Mostly, it doesn't. Here are some things that may or may not be related to aging another year, but that I've forced myself to notice.

1. I finally understand the phrase "Don't mix your alcohols".
2. I really don't get carded anymore, regardless of who I'm with.
3. I consider myself to be more serious about the activities I'm involved in and don't think about running away from the stress of responsibility.
4. I don't mind that I'm in the Midwest, for now.
5. My animals bring me endless amounts of joy, maybe not having children gives me more time for this.
6. I find it easier not to take things as personally and realize that other people have issues of their own that they battle with, it's not all just me.
7. Recognition for my hard work is nice, but not required.
8. I really miss having my family in my daily life.
9. I'm beginning to accept that some of my dreams are not feasible, and yet in some ways much more possible now that I don't have the hardcore attitude of being worthless if they don't happen.
10. Lists like this are harder because I want to be as honest with myself as possible.
11. My cynicism is aging like a fine wine.
12. I'm also more apt to know when it's not appropriate to share it with just anyone.
13. I'm really bored with just having a job, paying the bills should be secondary.
14. I am not going to quit my job just because I'm bored. I have a plan.
15. I'm still scared to take the risks necessary to make my plan reality.
16. I can actually come home and not feel like I need to clean, all night, every night.
17. Dilaram and I have been together 6 times as long as I've ever been with anyone, and it still feels like just the beginning.
18. I am looking forward to laughing with Cassie about all this when we're old.
19. Unlike Cassie, I'm not really feeling bad about getting older.
20. Twenty seems like more than just a decade ago.
21. Riding the bus isn't so bad, with and iPod.
22. This coming year I will master my scooter riding skills, and then no one will ever see me again, just me and the scooter, riding into the sunset.
23. I still want to elope to Iceland, someday.
24. I hope that someday isn't a decade away.
25. As much as I want to help make the world a better place, I don't like being involved in politics.
26. I think the most effective way to influence change is by planting gardens(for me) physically and metaphorically.
27. Focus, I need more of it.
28. I may never get to see an elephant or whale in the wild, and this makes me more and more sad.
29. I'm going to make the last year in my twenties count.


Now is the winter of our discontent.

Many people might misinterpret this phrase. It actually means: The time of unhappiness is past. It means that the things that have made us sad are sleeping in the cold ground.
Like Shakespeare, I may be misinterpreted, or even not understood. I like to think of myself as fairly straight forward, but that's all in my own head, anyway. The duality to this is that I secretly feel like I am a character in a foreign film, one in which most people do not know the language, and there is an incomprehensible plot. When the film ends, you are left wondering what just happened, and why, maybe you even find yourself feeling slightly existential in the sense that you just fell into a rabbit hole of nonsensical rhymes and non-meanings.
Maybe not.
Either way, I turned 29 at 7:47 this morning and I feel happy that I made it another year.


One Holiday, on the rocks, shaken

It's been awhile, and yet, I have no apologies or excuses. Instead I will attempt to fill the void that I am sure many people felt in my absence, with pictures.

We had a good, exhausting time in Colorado. I hate to even say this anymore: we never have enough time. It's always gut-wrenchingly hectic. The only good thing about the pace is it's a great excuse to drink more.

Here are a few images from Turkey day vacation:

We were really quite lucky with the timing of our trip since the day after we got back storms began to brew. On Thursday we had a pretty serious ice storm, which also had it's benefits:



A beautiful friend
Entered my life 15 years ago.

I somehow always knew that we'd be friends
now, even now
when she believes she is getting old.
I think we are still so young,
in many ways.
And have so many years yet to fill
with our friendship and our lives, well lived.

Love to you, my friend.