10.27.2007

Offensive Carcass

I was just reading a local blog that was discussing a petition for Anti-smoking legislation for any public space, what it really targets is places like food establishments and bars.
Having just returned from a trip that required air travel, to a city that already has and indoor smoking ban through out, I have to say a few things.
Firstly, I have no problem with stepping outside to smoke. I get that people don't like a lot of things that their fellow humans do, and don't want to be subjected to what they don't like. I'm not at all going to try to force someone to smoke with me, against their will. I try to be respectful, I don't stand right in front of the exit where they have to walk through a cloud of smoke. I don't blow it at people as they walk by. I don't even throw my butts at people who give me dirty looks and just generally look annoying.
Talk about anti-smoking anything always raises a few questions - such as - car exhaust, pollution, obesity. All these other things that cause more health problems than second-hand smoke. I've heard just about everything.
One thing I haven't heard, but think ALL THE TIME, is about the offensiveness of the carcass eaters food choices. I hate going to into a restaurant and being immediately attacked by the odor of carcass being baked, fried, sliced, diced, sauteed, boiled and chewed. Should I start trying to get laws passed about the unfairness of this? Why should I be subjected to having my pores being saturated with carcass greases and reminded of what all the carcass eaters will being carrying around in their colons for the next week?
The very idea that I would try to do such a thing would be very unpopular with most people - as most people in this country (and elsewhere) are partakers of animal flesh. I know that it wouldn't get very far and I'd be considered insane and silly.
And so, I just don't frequent places that are overtly focused on carcass-chomping. It's that simple. I don't have to attend Renaissance Festivals where people walk around chewing on turkey limbs, and I don't have to eat a wilted salad at a sizzling-cow buffet. Get over it, you always have the choice to just stay at home, at least then you wouldn't be polluting the air with your car exhaust.

10.01.2007

Un-mother

It can come out of nowhere. You might be sitting alone as night is
falling around you and it will rush into your head like a freight train
that has no manners. Sometimes it is a creeping thing that slowly
insinuates itself into your conscious thoughts.
The memories of hurtful words, biting and cutting at your confidence and resolve.
The things that people say to each other, out of anger, jealousy, self-hatred that is misdirected.
I
don't know why, out of all the things that someone might say to me,
that I would remember such things. These words, though, they scarred
me. They touched me more than any of the beautiful poems, the loving
embraces and longing gazes sent my direction. I can't even remember the
goodness -and I'm sure there must have been- because of one very short,
but very cutting remark.
I look at this comment from different
angles, trying to grasp a different feeling from it, but it still hurts
just like the first time you said it.Every time my memory replays it, it becomes more sinister.
Why does anyone carry such sadness with them? Why do I think I've let it go, only to find it lingering?
Surely
I've said things like this, to people I've loved. Something that they
carry through all their experiences, such a horrible way to remember
pieces of me that I've shared with them. Knowing this, that I too have
also caused this kind of pain, doesn't make me feel better, nor do I find it justifiable. But it makes it somehow more bearable in the sense that I can let go of my hatred of ones who have hurt me. For I also, have been a murderer of love.