Funny for a Monday

Two for one

Does anyone else find it ironic that California has some of the dirtiest air
and yet
it's practically illegal to smoke ANYWHERE in Cali?
(excerpt: prohibits smoking in all public places, indoor or outdoor, where anyone might be exposed to secondhand smoke, including outdoor cafes, bus stops, soccer fields, condominium pool decks, parks and sidewalks. Smoking in one's car is allowed, unless the windows are open and someone nearby might be affected.)

So, in summary,
It's ok to drive your 2 ton SUV 1/2 a block to buy baby food and soccer pads for the kiddies, but don't you fucking light up while doing it!

Take note Colorado readers:Elsewhere, the Colorado House gave final approval to a statewide smoking ban Friday and sent the bill to Gov. Bill Owens, who said he will sign it. Colorado would be the 13th state to enact such a ban.

Sushi-ya

This little clip was quite funny. vinegar feet?It reminded me of so many people, and their nasty habits of eating raw fish.

Actually I love sushi, but not with carcass. I even make it at home.
As I was looking for a few images it hit me at how obsessed people are with these little rolls. The possibilities are quite endless when it comes to how you can utilize them in everyday life.

Because the great Cassie has spoken....

I was told I should post this. I think Cassie is just too obsessed with this website. I'm pretty sure I saw Tom's middle daughter - who just turned 8 - on this website before. Anyhow, here it is.

I want one

This is a pretty cool concept. Although, if you're going to make the effort of walking around your house with a special tool to look at plants, you're probably assertive enough to water them regularly anyway.
Feed me, Seymour.
I suppose it would be more useful for farmers and things of that nature.

Something funny, Something stupid

I usually find bumpersticks somewhat annoying, being that people seem to express anything from their political views, to moral issues to personal philosophies-on their dirty bumper, peeling and fading into mixed messages.

But, I did see one yesterday that made me chuckle to myself:

Practice Safe Sex Just Say No to Sex with ProLifers

and driving to work this morning I was behind a beat-up old truck with plenty of "environmental" stickers about water quality and life quality and earth stuff AND his truck was spewing enough toxic fumes to pollute a small country for a week. I had to light another cigarette just to breath!

Au Lait?

I will be the first to admit that I have a caffeine addiction. I have been known to go to the coffee shop by my work twice in one day. Dilaram has wondered to himself how I could spend 17 dollars in one day at a coffee shop. I have no doubt that living in Portland only escalated this addiction; a place where there is almost a coffee shop on every block, and I don't mean Starbucks either.

So, since I started working at my current job two years ago I have become known at this little shop. It's actually not so little, it's in an old bank, they still have some of the old vaults which you can sit and sup in, it's cool. They also have a great selection of teas-all Republic of Teas, yum. The baristas there know my name and are already making my drink when I come in the door. It's nice, kind of like Cheers or something. They roast all their own coffee and they just started making their own pastries.
Why I am saying all of this? Because today I have an interview with the owner about working there. I'll probably just work on evenings and weekends. As a second job I hope to gain the following: experience that I can use when I open my own shop, free coffee(this is a very good reason), a little extra money. The money thing is not really that big of a motivator since I know I won't make much. But the number one reason? I'll be a cool barrista! yeah. I know silly, but I always like all the barrista girls there, and I just want to be that cool.

Bowing out

Dear Pentarchy,
Please accept this as my resignation. I am sure you will find a fast replacement that is better suited to your needs. What can I say, it was the best of times, it was the worst of times.
But not really, it wasn't really that dramatic or epic.
I will continue to post here as a solo agent.
Take care and have fun slinging mud.
I will leave you with the really nice link to an article that pretty much sums up everything that led up to my resignation.
37 million poor

By the balls, the frozen balls

Dilaram and I went out of town this weekend to say goodby to a good friend who is moving to Portland. When we got back yesterday afternoon it was frigid in the downstairs part of our house. I thought this was odd since the heat was actually on 65, much higher than the thermostat upstairs. I know heat rises so I just turned it up to 70 and commenced cleaning. Because I was moving around I didn't realize how chilly it truly was becoming with the sun setting until I went upstairs and it felt toasty. So I went in the basement to check on things and lo! the furnace that heats the first floor is not even on. I tried everything and it just won't turn on. It's cold and now all my plants are starting to look real unhappy. Of course this happens when it's below freezing weather, not last week when it was almost 70 for a few days.
When I called the gas company phone number that was on my furnace they informed me that they won't even come look at it until I pay the balance of my bill.
*Background Info* We received a gas bill for December for $550 dollars! A guy from the gas company came out on Jan 4th and read the meter which is inside.. So I called them back and asked that they come read it again. They realized they screwed up majorly at some point and our bill for January ended up being $94. How does that work, how do you go from 550 to 94. It's not like it's been really warm for the past few months. I think something is still wrong. ANYWAY, regardless, we haven't paid our whole balance and I know we need to get on budget billing. I'm just so irate at this point that if we didn't have a gas dryer and oven I would let them shut us down and buy some fucking space heaters.
The upside to the furnace not working? I guess my gas bill will go down...ha, it better.

You must watch

This is ingenious, well-done.
Thumbs up.
Brokback to the Future

The stuff of Dreams/Reflection

So, awhile back A-ron was talking about how he is a true believer. Perhaps this is a matter of semantics, but I think fundamentally it's similar. I can't say that I'm a true believer, but I am a dreamer. If you broke down everyone's inner hopes, we may all have similar dreams for the worlds that exist in our hearts. Our dreams may all coincide nicely. What I dream and imagine is probably not all that different in some sense from A-ron's, Locos or even (gasp) numerous villified political icons that we won't name.
I think some of the differences are noticed in the acting out of these dreams and hopes for the world. Much of my dream consists of stuff right out of"Imagine" by John Lennon . I really do want the world to be peaceful and for no one to suffer. A bit high on the improbabality scale? maybe. But that is my dream, and I do not really have a true belief in that happening. This dream has nothing to do with going around forcing my dream on others. It's hard for me to readily accept the possibilty that at the root of it all everyone may have similar dreams to mine, because I look at the world around me and it seems like a total paradox to the world in my heart and head.
But, some part of me has to be able to see the human side of what I could so easily term evil, or bad because I don't agree with it. And I know that because I am like this inside, because I strive for balance, understanding and acceptance that I am different from some people. The difference being that I do that at all. That I do not blindly see my way as right and any other way as wrong. This is not something that is easy or natural, but I make a conscious effort to try to do this. It creates many internal struggles,
But I am trying. And I hope that at least makes a difference.

Brilliant

And just when I thought my elders didn't have anything to teach me.
This article made me really happy, warm and fuzzy inside.



And I smile

I would like to have one of these

This would be really cool to be able to get away from rat races and cities. And having land in the forest like that would be nice too.
I wonder though, if this kind of thing will end up being like Xanadu?
I'm waiting until he makes the kind with bathrooms in them though.

Here's their website

uh, um this is a joke right?

Ok, this guy is friggin crazy

He's running for Governor of Minnesota. You really must check out his site to get the full impression and also to read his platform. He even has a presidential page!
Hey, if you don't vote for him, he might impale you.


Who the hell is this demon?!

So, I ran across a funny little thing

My favorite part of the "Aliens" is that even the aliens have little bunny ears.
Some of you have probably already seen these, whatever, it's funny.

Funny Bunnies

A movie we've all been watching for far too long...

and with no awards worth mentioning:

Silliness

What was No.1 on the day you were born?

UK
Mull Of Kintyre / Girls' School - Wings

US
You Light Up My Life - Debby Boone

The day I turned 18?

US
One Sweet Day - Mariah Carey with Boyz II Men

UK
Earth Song - Michael Jackson

Damn, that's all pretty sucky.
Are you any better?

One thing that touches me

I have read about this for a few years now. In the article they talk about how people are disrespectful. I think it's a damn shame that people can't let anything remain alive with poetry and signifigance in this world.
R.I.P. E A POE
I really feel let down when I read stuff about how stupid people are. Like, what would they accomplish by unmasking the visitor.
Can't they leave it alone? Why must these people have no mystery?
It bothers me.
So while this one act of wordless respect really touches me, the reaction to it makes me want to touch the idiots, with my fist or something.

Goals

We all have to have goals, or we should anyway.
I've decided to make a list of the things I want to be when I grow up, to help my perspective I suppose:

1. Piano Tuner
2. a wraith or at least an UE
3. Teahouse owner/operator
4. My own personal clothes designer/sewing mistress supreme
5. Linguist or translator of scripts, at least for my own amusement
6. Gardner, esp. orchid grower
7. Cello player

These are just a few things that I want to focus on. Which means I need to quit my job....

Ok, one more

This is great,
A response to A-Ron and Heather:
you decide:
Forbes says that KC is the worst for culture...go figure

DAMN!

and then there is this!
Cass, you're right on the money, you shouldn't be moving! unless you're planning on settling down!
Denver? Single?

Locos got game

Hey, so this is more of a bulletin focused on locomocos wise career choice:

check it out
I applaud you my friend
I'm actually on the "good" list,
at least it's not on the poor list
althought, it's all relative, even though attorney may be on the poor, most of them still make waay more than I do.

This is not the greatest song in the world, this is a tribute

So,
I became painfully aware of how I have not really ever posted a truly devotional piece about the one I love.
So, Dilaram, is for you.

He taught me how to believe in love again, in so, so many ways.
He touches me as no one else ever could; and when he does it feels like that poem that Walt Whitman wrote, about singing the Body Electric.
He has inspired poetry and lots of sentimental stuff that I won't divulge, because it is for him only.
I never really thought much of marriage, and still don't,
but I know that my marriage to him will make all of the reasons that I don't think much of it null and void.
He is my unspoken heart in this world.

Postparty

SO, I'm posting some pictures from the most fun birthday party I've had to date, really the first "party" I've had for my birthday.

Some of The Attendees


There was much sushi and much dancing,





Many people wanted to dress me, and maybe kick my ass a little




Ok, so I got a lot of really cool presents, my sister came,

my boyfriend kept lavishing me with gifts, including the camera that took these pictures.
The company of many friends, it made all of the holiday crap that followed not as painful. Thank you everyone who shared it with me.

Oh, vindication, O sweet truth

Ok, so I just read the most touching and amusing story I've read about the holiday season in many years.
It brought a twinkle to my eye and a chuckle to my belly.
I'd love to make a film short of this. A docudrama, if you will.
this is so beautiful

BAH XMESS, here's to blind consumerism of the masses

Ok,
So I've got to say it, I'm sick of all this Xmess crap. I am a scrooge, a grinch and really bored with all the hype. I know many companies make all their money for the rest of the year in a few weeks or months from all this. Whatever.
I don't have the tradition instilled in me to get all blubbery when I see stupid nativity scenes, I don't start saliviting when I hear sleigh bells and I think the best thing ever made about Xmess was the "Nightmare Before..."
I'm bothered by the guilt associated with buying gifts for people, even relatives that you don't even like that much; I guess it's quite a fitting behavior for good little Christians though.

I like winter, and I even like the idea that you should be kind and giving to your fellow man, but that should be all the time, not just once a year, on a fake birthdate of some over-publicized dude who may or may not have walked around in the fertile crescent many many years ago.

As for most of the traditions that are perpetuated during the holiday season, most of them are much older than this whole "Christmas" thing, and that whole conversation is so trite I'm not even going to go into it. But if you want to read more, go Yule up your butt

So enough with my rant, below are some activities, info and just stuff for people who may or may not share my sentiments


*Holly Jolly My Ass*

"Have a holly jolly Christmas" my ass. The best time of the year?

I don't don't know if I'll survive all of this bloody "cheer".

"Have a holly jolly Christmas" songs like this fill me with fear.

And if this season is the best it gets, just shoot me dead right here.

"Have a holly jolly Christmas"....what is it to have a "holly" something? It sounds rather queer.

"Have a holly jolly Christmas" I took out my Walmart gun, and drank another beer

"Have a holly jolly Christmas", I went across the street, and shot my neighbor's plastic raindeer.

"Have a holly jolly Christmas", plays as I sit here in my cell.

The guard tells me to can it as I hollar "Christmastime can go to hell"

if you want to read more anti-Xmess songs and find fun activities, go here

From my world

I wanted to share a few things I found this week that amused or interested or just scared me.
In honor of my birthday which was surely an amusing but scary day, 28 years ago:
Scary


Read about him here

Tis the Season






So this post is not only about how awesome December 15th is because it's my birthday, but also because I am finally putting a new post up AND I have finally figured out the whole fucking layout finally!

Have some cake!

hmmm

I find this amusing because if I had been born a boy my parents WERE going to name me DALLAS!



(Refresh if picture doesn't show.)
Dallas Winston: Dally is the toughest one in the
greaser gang and never likes to follow the law.
He is 17 years old, hates most people, is cold
and bitter, and doesn't like to be told what to
do.


Which Outsiders Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Is that a compliment?

So, Tom just informed me that he won the red stapler award at work. They actually gave him a red swingline stapler!!
I think that a certificate to starbucks would have been nicer, or a trip to Ireland, or something.
I'm not sure if this is a good thing, actually. Wasn't Milton the one that got moved to the basement and burned the place down?

It's for my health, to my health

Ok, so, this article proves that I'm doing good. Sadly I'm not sure if I can be classified as a moderate drinker. Most days it's just one or two drinks, some days none, somedays one or two bottles of wine, so either way it balances out, and I'm healthier!
Ha!

Link text goes here
Other Link

I still can't figure out the stupid link option.
Whatever.

Fer Sure, Man

You are Janice.You dig the groove man, nothing can bum you out.
Too bad you're too stoned to notice.
INSTRUMENT:Like, you know, guitar, fer sure.LAST BOOK READ:"Finding Your Past Lives on the Web"
FAVORITE EXPRESSION:"Fer sure, like, fer sure."
FAVORITE THINGS:Peace, love and, like, granola, totally.
NEVER LEAVES HOME WITHOUT:Her inner child.

What Muppet are you?
brought to you by

Rasta O'Connor?

So,
I just got back from Chicago. I went up there to spend a few days with Dilaram and to go to see Sinead O'Connor.
I had heard before hand that her new album is completely Reggae, so I went somewhat prepared.
The whole day was kind of tepid. I was really looking forward to going to the Art Institute. I got up early and walked over, as I walked just 8 blocks it got increasingly colder and windier. I had to stop and buy gloves and a hat which helped. I enjoyed the art museum, it's so wonderful there. I am always amazed at the paintings you find as you turn corners. Originals, that you see in text books and art books and to see the real thing is pretty amazing. After having lunch with Dil I went back to the hotel since it was downright frigid at that point. I proceeded to have a few vodka tonics and went back to the room and passed out until Dil got off work. We had to rush to get ready and catch the El(elevated transit in Chicago). When we got to the venue we still had about 40 minutes. As we were walking up to the theatre it looked odd because there were no people and the lights were off. There was a sign on the door that they had moved the concert to some other theatre. As we were starting to walk back to the El, two guys who also were there for the show asked us if we knew where the other place was, they offered to give us a ride. They were the cutest latino couple, and offered us fresh coconut. We got lost for about 30 minutes and barely made it to the concert. Only to find that the reggae band was playing for about 45 minutes before Sinead even came on stage.
I can't even really say what I thought of the concert. On one hand, it wasn't BAD really, but she didn't play one single old song, and for the most part she'd just sing bits here and there since the band spent a lot of time jamming out. The best parts were when she would sing with an acoustic guitar and this freaky dancer girl was on stage singing with her. Overall, it was a slight disappointment, I guess. Even though I've listened to some of it online, the new album, and I like it actually, I just didn't enjoy the concert as much as in the past when I saw her. And just added to a somewhat tepid day.
So, we stayed out late drinking and now I'm going to bed really early.

It's time to tell about the Ice

So, My sweet lover told a bunch of people about our plans so I guess I may as well break the ice and let it be told.
Tom and I decided that we wanted our marriage to be really special. We never wanted anything traditional anyway. After a few months of talking about planning our wedding every weekend to no avail we started to discuss the possibility of going to Iceland for our honeymoon.

And as this idea progressed we started thinking that just getting married and having that be our whole ceremony, the idea grew on us. We both sighed with relief and now it just seems like the right thing to do.
We weren't going to tell anyone, at least not right now.
But SOMEONE had dinner with SOME people and spilled the beans. SO, I'm just going to let it air out before I tell my parents.
I can't seem to get the picture layout thing either.
So, here's a very simple representation of my inspiration. I won't even go into the dream I had over two years ago about me and Tom and glaciers.
Yeah, I know, it's called elopement.

And Now, For Something completely Different

I look at myself
or who I think I am
and I find a jigsaw puzzle, and none of the pieces are of the same picture.
I remember who I was as a child,
I can still feel the embarassment of adolescence.
Sometimes I still miss being a young adult.
But what am I now?
I
realize
that this sucks, but I'm trying to find my place again.
What is a 27 year old?
What does that mean, anyway?
When I try to measure that with accomplishments, it seems trite and doesn't really fit. That is what most people seem to believe. That when you reach stages, you should have certain things figured out and own things, and have kids, et al.
But that doesn't mean anything. Not to me.
I have to figure out what it means to me.
And until I do,
I am not quite sure who I am.
Maybe that is what a 27 year old is.







End of thought

back to the regularly scheduled sarcasm.
thank you

Monkey what?

So, all this talk of monkeys started me thinking about the etymology of "monkey" and how it is somewhat synonymous with the word "shit" in my mind.
You can pretty much substitute Monkey with Shit in most cases. And they still hold the same meaning.
EX:
Don't give me that ___ a)monkey b)shit
you look like ___ a)shit b)monkey ( this can also be followed by ass, another good adjective)
Yeah, she was down on the corner talking ____ about you a)monkey b)shit
you smell like ___ a)shit b)monkey

don't drink that ____! a)monkey b)shit


you get the idea

So, the only varying thing I noticed is that you usually need to preceed monkey with "a" which is obviously points to the fact that most people consider monkeys nouns, what the shit is that about?
so, this is my tribute to monkeys, whether they be on your back, your friends chest, in the latrine, the back yard or the jungle.
oh yeah, and here's your new post
so monkey this

(the most glaring comparison of the two words that I thought of was: you don't want to go spank your shit)


Also, whilst trying to find an image of a good monkey-shit I found this, which made me think of many pirate references which I won't bore you with since this is already my longest post, ever:


The word "monkey" is of uncertain origin; its first known usage was in 1498 when it was used in the literary work Reynard the Fox as the name of the son of Martin the Ape. "Monkey" has numerous nautical meanings, such as a small coastal trading vessel, single masted with a square sail of the 16th and 17th centuries; a small wooden cask in which grog was carried after issue from a grog-tub to the seamen's messes in the Royal Navy; a type of marine steam reciprocating engine where two engines were used together in tandem on the same propeller shaft; and a sailor whose job involved climbing and moving swiftly (usage dating to 1858). A "monkey boat" was a narrow vessel used on canals (usage dating to 1858); a "monkey gaff" is a small gaff on large merchant vessels; a "monkey jacket" is a close fitting jacket worn by sailors; "monkey spars" are small masts and yards on vessels used for the "instruction and exercise of boys;" and a "monkey pump" is a straw used to suck the liquid from a small hole in a cask; a "monkey block" was used in the rigging of sailing ships; "monkey island" is a ship's upper bridge; "monkey drill" was calisthenics by naval personnel (usage dating to 1895); and "monkey march" is close order march by US Marine Corps personnel (usage dating to 1952)

This should make you geeks drool for some toast or something

Each year at the Tulsa State Fair, an artist is commissioned to make a sculpture out of butter. In past years, cows, farmers, and baseball players were created out of hundreds of pounds of butter. This year, in celebration of Star Wars's final episode, TSF is featuring Darth Vader and Yoda, all dairy-like

blahblah

I just completed my first ever jury duty assignment.. They should call it schmuck duty. It was pretty boring. But sort of interesting, I'm not into reality tv though, and I could tell that most of the people were totally into it in vicarious way. Which is frightening when you consider that they're making decisions that affect other lives.
I don't have much interesting going on at the moment. We worked in our yard all weekend and built a really nice flower bed, still need to do the other side of the yard. It was really hard work. Cassie, next time you need to send some Mexicans over to help!

So obvious!

You are Miyagi from the Karate Kid. You are a
perfectionist when it comes to car detailing,
fence painting and deck sanding. Your wisdom is
tinted with humor and I'm positive you smoke
those little bonsai trees when nobody's
looking.

Which 80's Movie Character Are you?"
brought to you by

That's It!

So, I was already thinking of a new post when you put that on my comments, Cas.
Ugh, this week has sucked in so many ways. The dog I got is now fast becoming a large burdensome source of stress to me. And my cats, who are trying to tell me of their displeasure by not using their catboxes. The dog needs more attention than I can give it, she's really potentially a good dog, I know it, but she needs a lot of training. And I realized that I also cannot leave town like I used to, for even a weekend without the added $expensive$ of kenneling her.
So,
all week I felt horrible about my secret thoughts of not being able to keep her. And I broke last night after having to wash the bedding AGAIN, and cleaning up the cat residue from the ONLY carpeted area in my house. I called the animal rescue that helped me find her and they're going to talk to the German Shepherd rescue to see if they can find her a good home. I'm not going to take her to a shelter, but I am trying to think of myself as more of a foster-mom than her owner at this point. I am going to sign us up for obediance classes next week. I feel awful though, it's really depressing me, like I'm giving up on her, but I'm so tired of it.
And
after it all, I can honestly say,
I am not a dog person.
I love animals, but lately I don't even want to have the responsibility of cats, or turtles, or anything.
And so, with this said,
on the way to work today, my car died.
Actually, about 5 miles from work, all the lights came on, it was driving in the winter mode, which only goes about 10 mph or something. And it was making funny noises. I did get to work, and tried to start it again, and it seemed fine. So tried taking it to the car shop and it died.
So, tow truck, and no word of what's wrong with it, possibly til Tuesday, and 1 rental car later.
I feel even more upset.
That's my life Cassie,
I don't even have a funny ending to this one.
bleh.
No pictures either.

We should've just asked Peewee all along!

hahaha
if you can't read it
it says:
"Oh, why yes, Mr. President, I believe that the WMDs are in the basement of the Alamo."
I stole this from PlanetDan. I love it.

Hell is other people

Curmudgeon:(Definition) "A crusty, ill-tempered soul who takes a dim and cynical view of persons, events, institutions, human nature and life in general."

I don't like people, not much.
Perhaps I should rephrase that, I don't like very many people. Perhaps I should elaborate upon that quantification.
I only like a few people.
I like most people more than onions, but for anyone that knows me very well, that isn't saying much.
I'm not going to say anything right now that most people do not already know, and maybe even agree with.
People are stupid, as a whole. In fact, I find myself overly amazed when they prove me wrong.
I am a curmedgeon. More so than most old men. Unfortunately I think it may turn me into a hermit someday, and then before I know it I'm going to be a crazy cat lady. Only, I'm not really a horder.
If someone can give me a few credible examples of why I should not be disgusted with humans in general, I dare them. I want to know why there are people who see hope and beauty and even a touch of humanity in their fellow men. There is no humanity in humans, what a fucking dichotomy. Most of them are just scarred up, pathetic little wastes of skin and space.
Prove me wrong. I beg of you
and dare you....

ok

So, on the profile page I can upload my picture, but it doesn't show on my blog, like Cassie's and everyone else's. I think I need to edit the HTML on my template, Tom doesn't think that is where to do it. Help!

Damn punkass hoodlums

So, I went home at lunch to walk to canine. As I was returning to my house a questionable individual started calling out stuff from the bad neighbors porch. I kept ignoring him and then he called out about wanting to sell me something, some kind of floor wipes or something. I said no thanks. He kept trying to ask me questions and I evaded them until the dog was done and then I went inside.
So, I don't live in the best neighborhood, coupled with my paranoia and tendency to worry too much, I began worrying about the other four guys that I noticed hanging about the block. And I started thinking that maybe they were scoping out houses to rob and they saw me leave and then I just couldn't stop imagining them breaking into my house and stealing everything and letting the cats out. Argh!
So, I got back to work and called the cops and said there were suspicious characters hanging about, they said they'd send someone out to check on it.
Am I stupid? Should I leave work to check on things?
I feel quite worried now.

Those Germans!

They're so crazy
Krazy Krauts

Thank you Dan

If it weren't for Planet Dan I never would have understood my condition. In fact I never knew it was one until I found the fainting goat site through Planet Dan. Now, thankfully I know that I have myotonia congenita.
When I am frightened my feet and ankles do this. I have never really fallen over like these silly goats, but I've come close....
You ought to check this website out!
""
Watch the videos, it's awesome!

Marzipan Babies

Does anyone else find this creepy? I'm assuming the person who started a false claim that these thing are made of Marzipan must have thought so too, and the only way to make it creepier is to imagine eating it....
Snopes discredits this claim, but then when you venture to the website it gets really weird. The only people I can imagine buying these things are ladies that really want babies but can't have them, so they carry a fake, but life-like one around to placate themselves.
Strange
I can't seem to get the picture up, so you'll have to go to the link to see what I'm talking about.
http://www.snopes.com/photos/arts/marzipan.asp

Sweet!

So, is it just me, or is Kate striking the Napolean pose here?

or go to the link if you like....

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/41193

Dying Boy Brought In To Cheer Up Kansas City Royals
September 29, 2005 | Issue 41•39

KANSAS CITY—Desperate to give their last-place, 100-loss team something to smile about, the Royals arranged to have a terminally ill little boy pay a visit to their clubhouse Tuesday. Danny Gladstone, 8, a leukemia sufferer who is expected to live just long enough to see the Royals make a run at setting a franchise record for losses, arrived at Kauffman Stadium at 11 a.m., and was immediately swarmed by players excited to see someone else who wouldn't be around in October. "I can't even explain how uplifting it is to see somebody who soon won't have to put up with the pain and misery anymore," Royals first baseman and team captain Mike Sweeney said. "Even though we have to endure the same terrible fate again come April, Danny, unlike the Royals organization, will be in a far better place." Sweeney concluded the meeting by promising the boy he would ground into a double play for him during that night's game.
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Rat Bastards!

So, last Wednesday it rained here in St. Louis. Not like a crazy rain, or even a windy rain blowing sideways rain. Just some rain, for about an hour. And then maybe some drizzle. But around 7:30pm my internet went out. It has not come back up. The previous Thu. it went out for about 12 hours, following a little rain.
I have called Charter over and over and then want to send someone out to check the line. On Thursday night they said they couldn't get anyone out until Tuesday. And, to complete my aggravation they can only come 1-5, like I don't have a fucking job. When I ask if it'll be credited they are somewhat non-committal and vague about it, they never directly say yes. I am not paying them for almost a week of no service.
The thing that pisses me off is how nonchalant they are about it all. It's really inexcusable manner of running a business. The thing is, they know that people who want cable internet have no choice. They have a monopoly here in St. Louis and probably many other places too. It sucks ass so bad. Does anyone know of a decent reliable, fast service that I can get at home? I really want cable, because we don't have a land line, we use vonage and have no need for a land line, and that would just be another frivolous bill every month.
I hate Charter.
There has to be something better.